Gross Pig Wins Big Brother Canada

Jon

Jon

I don’t care if he played a good game.  I don’t care if he has a likable personality.  I don’t care that Canada loves him . . .

Last night, Jon Pardy won the second season of “Big Brother Canada.”  I would have been more excited to to see him win the $100,000 prize if he didn’t disgust me so much.  This is the guy who spend half the season with his hands down his pants scratching his balls.  If that wasn’t bad enough, he actually got an infection on his penis from scratching his balls.  Along with that accomplishment, he also grossed-out his fellow house guests with his overall lack of hygiene.  At one point in the game, another contestant introduced him to dental floss.  He had never flossed before.  Then, during the finale, he cut himself and bled all over the host.

Yechh!  That’s all I can say.

Rooting for the Villain

Sabrina

Sabrina

Just a moment ago I was wondering why I tend to root for the villains on reality shows.  I came to a few conclusions.

On candid reality shows, I don’t actually root for the villain.  Nothing would please me more than seeing Kenya Moore twirl her way into oblivion on “The Real Housewives of Atlanta,” for instance.

On competitive reality shows, however, I do root for the villain when the fans have a say in the outcome of the show.  I guess I just like the contestants who torment the sort of television viewers who bother to vote for their favorites on these programs.  It’s not as if I’m trying to be contrary for the sake of being contrary.  I just like to watch the fans being tortured by people like Sabrina on “Big Brother Canada.”  The longer she stays in the house, the crazier the fan forums get as disgruntled viewers whine and complain about her conduct.

I felt the same way about Rachel Reilly when she won “Big Brother 13.”  I hated her in her original season unless she was torturing the equally obnoxious Ragan Fox.  But once she started torturing the fans, I became her number-one fan.  I wonder what that says about me?  Hmmm . . .

The Ten Biggest Mistakes on Big Brother Canada Season 2

Big Brother

Big Brother

It’s easy to sit back and watch “Big Brother Canada Season 2” and bitch and complain about how terribly all the house guests are playing the game.  Even Peter Brown can do it and he is the least-talented person on earth!  Still, I’d do almost anything to get on the show, so I watch it and analyze what the contestants are doing.  If Robyn Kass ever decides to have someone over forty-years-old with a brain in the house, I want to be that person.  So I’ve been paying special attention to what people have been doing wrong this season, just in case a miracle happens and I get a callback.  In no particular order, here’s my top-ten list of the most-heinous mistakes the house guests have made.

#1: The First Five should have had a back-up plan: The Second Seven.  Rachelle and Allison were right in front of them with the numbers they needed.  Arlie wouldn’t have been able to flip the house and I have no doubt that most of them would still be in the game.

#2: Kenny’s goodbye message to Ika was even worse than his double-finger salute to her when she entered the house after shredding the letters from home.  Being pretty on the outside can only get you so far in the game.

#3: When Arlie approached Sarah in the bathroom to let her know that he would be voting her out, he did it to appear contrite — as if he had been backed into a corner.  She knew it.  He tried the same thing with Allison and she ran to Neda and Heather in order to blow up his game.  He was playing for jury votes and covering his bases in case someone came back into the house when he should have been biding his time.  He was always a few steps ahead of himself and it ruined his game.

#4: Kyle and Adel’s self-isolation during the first couple of weeks was their own fault. You don’t make inroads in this game by standing on the outside watching what everyone is doing.

#5: Everything about Paul’s game was a mistake, but calling Andrew a sexist and a racist crossed a line that no one could forgive.

#6: On that note, Adel’s nomination speech to Sabrina was idiotic, and Neda’s speech to Allison wasn’t much better.  Neda also insulted Arlie in her goodbye message.  Way to play to the jury, you nincompoops!

#7: Arlie’s Angels should have saved Arlie.  Yeah, he was overplaying every chance he could get, but it wasn’t their alliance who put him on the block.  Keeping him was no more dangerous than keeping Adel.

#8: Sarah’s unalterable perception of Kenny was short-sighted.  She could have made it so much deeper in the game if she had distanced herself from a guy who would . . .

#9: . . . sit in front of Heather and tell her that Jon was her biggest enemy when he could have been bad-mouthing Rachelle instead.  Kenny had terrible instincts in this game.

#10: Canada threw every advantage in this game to underdogs and people who weren’t playing as hard as the others because the First Five looked like “bullies.”  That’s the nature of the game, and the Sloppy Seconds have become the replacement bullies.  The result is a final-six where a Jon/Neda finale looks like a foregone conclusion.  Boring!

Sabrina Can’t Be a Capricorn

Sabrina

Sabrina

Here’s a funny photo of Sabrina from “Big Brother Canada” that I found on the show’s Facebook page.

My friend Deb once had this hilarious book that described the worst qualities of all twelve zodiac signs.  For Capricorn, the author mentioned “eating and crying at the same time.”  That image has intrigued me for my entire career as an astrologer because I believe it’s uncannily accurate.  I believe that Capricorns are generally discrete, so when they go overboard with binge eating and feeling sorry for themselves, it’s usually done in a very controlled fashion in the privacy of their own homes.  They tell themselves “I’m going to eat this whole pie and cry for ten minutes before I pull myself together and face the world again.”  It doesn’t happen often, but it happens.

Anyway, Sabrina seems to be engaging in this sort of behavior every ten minutes or so, on camera for the whole world to see. She can’t be a Capricorn.  I’m going to poke around the web and see if I can figure out what sign she is.  With all that blubbering and self-delusion, my guess is Virgo.